Living as a bisexual can be hard. You would rather be straight or gay and avoid the stigma that comes with the bisexual label. But if you have already realized who you really are, then you do not have a choice and anything otherwise would just be a plain lie.

I am bisexual and I’ve had my own rough moments with straight and gay people alike. I have been labelled a ‘sex addict’, ‘confused’ and even ‘greedy’;-that I want ‘to have my cake and eat it’.

Like every other bisexual in any part of the world, I have had to content with moments of wondering who I really was, what I really wanted and when I was ever going to ‘switch’, something I had been told was inevitable.

I recently attended a sexuality workshop (women only) right here in the city where I had to write down my sexual identity. I looked around me wondering how all the lesbian women around me (the highest percentage, followed by bisexual and a transgendered woman) would ‘view’ me. Then I thought about the person I was currently dating-a lesbian woman. I held my pen for a few seconds longer than (probably) anyone else had. Eventually, I wrote it down-I am bisexual. This means that I can be in a relationship with (or have sex with) a man or a woman. This despite the fact that I tend to be more attracted to women and get into relationships with women. Still, if a ‘hot’ man with a light above the left side of his head dropped before me and I was  SINGLE  and attracted to him-I would get him.

But accepting and acknowledging my sexual identity (sometimes) feels like craziness. Straight men (and women) want to have a threesome with me while lesbians are afraid of getting into a relationship with me because I might leave them for a man. Actually, these were the very words from my lesbian girlfriend who I have been dating for about month now. I have even begun wondering  how and when (if ever) her perceptions of bisexuals will ever change. I know myself, I said, I’m the kind of person who can be in a monogamous relationship with one partner IF IT IS A SATISFYING one. And NO! It is therefore not always true that bisexuals have both a girlfriend and a boyfriend at the same time.

So, inspite of the pressure (non-verbal internal and external) I will still identify as a bisexual because this is who I am.